Speaking of caterpillar shit, I’m headed to Victoria this Wednesday with my mother. Our last conversation didn’t bode at all well and went like this:

Me: “I marked up the AMA map with stuff we can do within walking distance of our hotel. The musem and art gallery are - ”

Mom: “Oh, I thought we could just sort of sleep in every day and do spa treatments for the rest of the day.”

Me: “For three days?!”

Mom: “Yes. Why, what did you have in mind?”

Me: “The Victoria Bug Zoo - ”

Mom: “Ugh. No. What do you think a vacation is for anyway?”

Apparently, it is for doing the exact same thing you’d do if you happened to have three days off at home. It appears I have been labouring under a misapprehension all my life.

Wish me luck.